Pen Green Centre for children and their families

My mum would come to me, she’d have my daughter who’s just turned two, at my house, and I’d I take my son whose six to school, he’s in year one. I would work four days a week. It meant my daughter had all her toys and things at my house, they have a lovely relationship, she would take her to groups and she got that interaction from other children. I would work 8.30am to 2.30pm so I could pick-up my son from school four days a week. On a Wednesday I would work late and so mum would pick him up, and she would start dinner, then I would come home and take over –that would work well for us. My social circle is quite close, people that I see regularly friends and close family members. We would meet at weekends, I’d spent time with family members, my grandparents, shopping, feed the ducks that sort of stuff, just normal life.

So then the world was very different – initially it was panic, “oh god something is happening” something that you wouldn’t expect in this day and age. My chest is bad so that worried me. It was the fear of what does that mean am I at particular risk, and should I be around my kids. My dad has COPD too – so we were really worried about that, and we were wondering should he be around the kids, and what did that mean about shielding, should we be near my mum if he’s shielding or him coming near us.

Then it was like… schools are closed… so what does that mean? I still had to go work, my work hadn’t closed. Schools were closed, and Boris said you’re not allowed to do so many things, and on that Monday in work everyone was like what are we doing… how close can we get… I was really, really nervous. My husband’s work had closed, within the hour when Boris said about the lockdown. He had a text, but I was like I haven’t heard anything, I didn’t know what to do next, I was like “I guess I just have to go in and see what’s happening next” it was just not clear. Boris was saying everything is locking down don’t leave your house, everyone was thinking of themselves and their loved ones, worried if they were spreading it and here we were still working, still trying to sort out working from home getting that up and running. A lot of people were feeling uneasy and upset, two members of staff packed up and left. Then those who were left were feeling, ‘why it is ok for you and not us’. We’d been talking about why we were in work for the last two weeks – we were all worried and anxieties just went through the roof. Then after that I’d got everyone sorted to work from home – but something happened and I had to come in the next day – I was panicking for myself and my dad – but I still had to come into work. Yeah that wasn’t a nice feeling.

But then as the weeks progressed and we were working from home, my husband was furloughed and we set up a system in the kitchen, my daughter was on the iPad with me, not the best, but I wanted to keep on top of school work – so my husband sat with my son and they did an hour or two and I worked as much as I could – then they all went into the garden and I would crack on. So we did that for a while and that was working. I had some time off too, as I had booked leave for my daughter’s birthday, so that was lovely to have time off. We did lots in the garden and my husband built a shed and a playhouse – it was fine. Then he got the call to say he was going back to work… that was it. I was like, “how am I going to manage working 6hrs and still look after two children?” I was still physically coming to work and doing two and half day stints, it was only six hours a day, and we talked about how to do it. We wondered if half a day each or whole days was better. We thought six hours was better as they’re are less people coming in and it was on six-week rota. This helped with the anxiety about coming in as I could see the changes, two metres distancing, sanitiser stations, seeing people was good. I missed adult conversations so it was fine – it really helped and by that point I’d spoke to the doctor and they said keep the two-meter distance and you’re not on the shielding list, so I felt like everyone else and that lifted some of that fear.

We didn’t leave the house really, we all went food shopping in the car as a family – I would go in and the kids would sit in the car with my husband. But because our garden is so big and we’ve had really good weather we haven’t really left the house. After week nine I thought “we should probably leave the house… shall we go for a walk?” I missed my grandparents, but I’ve not missed anything else. The past few weeks we’ve had friends in the garden, since they said you could do that. But yeah, that’s it.  My son had a play friend, his best friend from school, we’ve sat in the garden with them. I’ve missed going out for dinner and having big bbq and people round – but really I haven’t really missed too much.

Right now, I’m back in work and working four days a week as we’ve opened up longer hours, I do more hours over four days and couple of hours one day from home. My husband is full time and mum is happy to come and have the kids for me while I’m at work. I actually feel like this has been a blessing in my relationship with my daughter – I would have never had 14 weeks to spend with her.  I didn’t get that with my son. But with her I’ve physically seen her grow up, her hair has grown and her language has come on so much, she never shuts up! I would have never had that it if had not been for this lockdown.

It might have been mundane before – but it’s been easy – it’s made it easier.